i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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