I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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