Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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