Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
