o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT