Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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