first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
True strength comes from lack of pants
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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