Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize