The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
