pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
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