I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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