just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
