No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
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