Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover

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  (703): when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover http://tfl.nu/rhz0
  Replies (4) Good night (689) Bad night (940)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.

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  (816): She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal. http://tfl.nu/7hy6
  Replies (45) Good night (4946) Bad night (1078)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at

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  (732): I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at http://tfl.nu/9oei
  Replies (20) Good night (4787) Bad night (658)
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  (914): View more from New York

  my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet

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  (914): my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet http://tfl.nu/lao3
  Replies (55) Good night (2787) Bad night (5005)
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  (631): View more from New York

  This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.

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  (631): This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her. http://tfl.nu/wxz7
  Replies (6) Good night (5449) Bad night (1343)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.

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  (804): she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs. http://tfl.nu/jax9
  Replies (34) Good night (5221) Bad night (6559)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.

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  (724): I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move... (412): Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am. http://tfl.nu/4pbg
  Replies (13) Good night (5585) Bad night (1725)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.

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  (214): Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing. http://tfl.nu/4y7p
  Replies (9) Good night (6265) Bad night (1382)
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  (716): View more from New York

  She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..

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  (716): She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet.. http://tfl.nu/0ox8
  Replies (4) Good night (2301) Bad night (1105)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children

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  (248): The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children http://tfl.nu/7xpu
  Replies (6) Good night (4532) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.

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  (847): I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never. http://tfl.nu/n83d
  Replies (14) Good night (1921) Bad night (721)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...

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  (310): So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off... http://tfl.nu/wmce
  Replies (4) Good night (732) Bad night (1193)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today

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  (614): Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today http://tfl.nu/chyo
  Replies (5) Good night (1087) Bad night (524)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.

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  (337): Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it. http://tfl.nu/fud9
  Replies (1) Good night (278) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad

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  (540): And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad http://tfl.nu/nf3b
  Replies (4) Good night (222) Bad night (325)

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