omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I intend to get homeless drunk
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
50% drunk capacity currently
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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