the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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