I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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