Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
