It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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