it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
