I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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