it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
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Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize