I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
