uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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