Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
