This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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