How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
