Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
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