I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize