There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
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