I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize