Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Randomize
