I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
