You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
