I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
birth control should be required to get into college
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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