i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
