Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
