I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize