I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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