Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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