i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
