ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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