I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
