Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
