But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
