plz talk dirty to me
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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