i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
