Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
