i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is