My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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