I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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